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談話中的臨在
問：當我與其他人在一起時如何保持臨在？我如何才能將臨在帶入談話中？
埃克哈特：這並不容易。在你們開始說話的那一刻，兩個頭腦相遇了，它們互相強化對方。一個流動開始了，連續不斷的念頭的流動。上一刻你還是臨在的，然後有人開始說話。在談話中，空間丟失了。參與談話的兩個人完全喪失了對空間的感知。剩下的只是詞語、念頭和語言的表達，連續不斷的念頭轉化成了聲音。他們完全被它接管了。它有自己的動能 – 它幾乎就是一個小的實體，一個不願停止的流動。
時常地，它會在身體上引發情緒。而情緒又會強化和鞏固它。如果連續不斷的念頭引發了情緒，事實是它經常會這麼做，特別是當我們談論到其他人的時候，他們做了什麼，他們沒做什麼，他們對你做了什麼，他們對別人做了什麼，評論，說閒話，所有這些情緒化的東西，這時小我就進來了。當你批評別人時，小我感到更強大。通過貶低別人，在小我的虛幻的系統中，你的自我形象得到了一些加強。任何針對別人的批評都是這個能量流動的一部分。然後情緒也進來了，它們又對念頭進行了強化。這就是空間的喪失。
你要如何重新找回空間，不是說：“我再也不說話了”，有一件事是必須的，就是意識到，你喪失了空間。除此之外，你什麼也做不了 – 你是如此地被念頭之流接管，以至於你都意識不到你被它接管了 – 你什麼也做不了。“原諒他們吧，他們不知道自己做了什麼。”他們是無意識的。他們是念頭的續流。作為念頭之流，你不願意停止，因為你不願意終止你自己。每一個實體都希望盡可能長時間地保持住有形。
如果你意識到你喪失了“空間”，哪怕這意識非常輕微，這一刻你有了一個選擇。你的選擇是什麼？你可以選擇在這一刻，在頭腦的續流中，帶入一點臨在，一點空間。但是你如何做到呢？
它不僅僅會從你自己的內在到達你，它也會從其他人那裡到達你。覺知發生了，但可能僅僅維持三秒鐘，然後覺知又消失了。這兩三秒，你意識到了空間的喪失，你必須充分利用它，在這個空間中，你可以自由採取行動，做點什麼。通過一個有意識的選擇，你將注意力從念頭中拔出來 – 但你必須在其他什麼地方將它固定住，否則沒有用。所以你選擇將注意力放在呼吸、身體，或者是周圍你可以感知到的其他東西上面。當你在和另一個人交談的時候，最容易的方法可能就是利用你的呼吸或者內在身體。
在情況容易些的時候，事先做練習，這樣你就可以在需要的時候做它了。進入你的內在身體，感受你體內活生生的能量場。然後你會注意到，你沒有在思考。你可以繼續聆聽。這真奇妙，你可以如此自在地、美麗地聆聽另一個人，而沒有思考。
你在聆聽，但你部分的注意力放在你的能量場上 – 這樣你就將注意力從你的念頭上移開。在背景處有一種活力的感覺。
最終它會是無形的。它已經是進入無形的一個入口。感受一下，你坐在那裡聆聽，而你已經走出了念頭之流。然後，互動的質量瞬間轉變。另一個人可能沒有意識到發生了什麼，他可能會繼續說一會兒。這也並不意味著你不再回應。只是你回應的方式和回應的質量也不一樣了。你不再只是貢獻負面的能量了，雖然在大多數談話中是這樣。
然後，你說出來的話語也將攜帶著一些寧靜。它非常微妙，另一個人也許意識不到。繼續保持注意力在你的內在身體，讓它成為錨，然後你就會變得臨在。如果你再次丟失了它，如果另一個人說了什麼有挑戰性的話，然後過了一會兒你重新記起 – 你繼續回到內在身體。這是一個強有力的錨，然後一切都從這裡開始變得不一樣。這需要持續不斷的練習。
Question: How do I maintain a sense of presence when I’m in the company of another person? How do I bring presence into conversation?
Eckhart: It’s not easy. The moment you start talking, the two minds come together and so they strengthen each other. A flow starts, a stream of thought. A moment ago you were present, and then somebody starts talking. What applies here is the loss of space during the conversation. Both participants of the conversation have lost any sense of space. There are only the words, the mind, the verbalization, the stream of thinking that becomes sounds. They are taken over by that. It has its own momentum – almost a little entity, a stream, that doesn’t want to end.
Often, it generates emotions in the body. That strengthens it, amplifies it. If the mental stream triggers emotions, which it often does, especially when talking about other people, what they did, failed to do, did to you, did to others, criticisms, gossip, all kinds of emotional [things], the ego comes in. When you can criticize another, the ego feels a little bit stronger. By diminishing another, in the delusional system of the ego, you have enhanced your own self-image a little bit. Any criticism of another is a part of that energy stream. And then emotions come, and they amplify the thoughts. It’s the loss of space.
For you to regain space, without saying “I’m not talking anymore”, one thing is necessary for you – which is the realization that you’ve lost space. Without that, there’s nothing you can do – when you’re so taken over by a stream of thought, that you don’t even know you’ve been taken over by a stream of thought – there’s nothing you can do. “Forgive them, for they know not what they do”. They are unconscious. They are the stream of thought. And as the stream of thought, you don’t want it to end – because you don’t want your own end. Every entity wants to remain in form for as long as possible.
If there’s the slightest realization that you’ve lost [space], at that moment you have a choice. What is your choice? Your choice is to bring some presence, some space, into the stream of thought. But how do you do that?
It’s coming at you not only from within your own mind, but it’s coming at you from the other person too. The awareness is there, and it may only last three seconds, and then it’s gone again. So you have to use those two or three seconds, where you realize the loss of space, and do something in that space where you have some freedom to act. By a conscious choice, you take your attention out of thinking – but you have to anchor it somewhere else, otherwise it won’t work. So you choose your breath, or your body, or some other sense perception around you that you become aware of. When you are actually talking to another person, it’s probably easiest to either use your breath or your inner body.
Practice this beforehand, when conditions are easier, so that you can do it once it’s necessary. Go into your inner body, feel that your energy field is alive. And you’ll notice, you’re not thinking anymore. You can still listen. The amazing thing is that you can listen to another person, without thinking, easily, beautifully.
You are listening, but part of your attention is on your energy field – so you’ve taken attention away from your thoughts. There is a sense of aliveness in the background.
It’s ultimately formless; it’s already the doorway into the formless. Feel that while you sit there and listen, and you’ve stepped out of the stream of thinking. Then, the quality of the interaction immediately changes. The other person may not consciously notice what’s happening, and may carry on for a while. It also does not mean that you cannot respond anymore. But how you respond and the quality of your response changes, too. You are no longer contributing to the negative nature, which is often the case, in conversations.
A certain amount of stillness, then, will also be a part of the words that you speak. It’s so subtle that the other person probably will not notice it, consciously. So hang on to the inner body, let it be the anchor, and then you become present. If you lose it again, if the other person says something challenging, then after a little while you remember – and you go back into the inner body. That’s a powerful anchor, and then everything changes from there. It takes continuous practice.
